volleyball as my cca is about to come to an end, and it is just beginning to sink in how much im going to miss it. no matter how inefficient the training, how screwed up the politics, or how lousy we are, i've come to love volleyball over the past year. before last year, vball is a sport pretty much alien to me, except for the fact that i like the china national team and thinks that brazil is damn pro lol. anw season is coming to an end and we've lost all our games so far. first game was a major screw up - it was obvious some of us were nervous and even bordering on scared, and ppl like me were just not very focused. this was a match that we knew we did not try our best. the next match, however, was a different story altogether, and it so happens the pivotal moment in our whole season happened in this match. the first set we fought hard, the hardest i have seen from this team. i could literally feel that we were thinking of nothing but winning each and every point, and thats the way it should be all along. sadly it was to no avail and we lost the set by the smallest of margins - 24-26. it proved to be the turning point of our season - emotionally. the second we lost that set was the moment we realised that trying our best is simply not enough to win - even against a seemingly inferior opponent, we'll fall just short. our faces betrayed our emotions, and it all went downhill from there. the next set was a disaster, and then came our third match, a match we were destined to lose even before the first serve was hit. next tuesday is our last match, and i really hope we can draw on our last reserves of energy, motivation and hope to win it not only for our coach and teammates, but more importantly to prove to ourselves that we are indeed capable of winning.

After season end, it'll be mugging, mugging and more mugging. it certainly wont be pretty. what i want most is just to continue playing vball, because it has already subconsciously become a part of my life

arghhh blogger deleted one whole paragraph from my previous post.pissed off ttm now.anw that para was basically saying that the most lasting lesson i learnt from taiwan trip is to make the best out of the situation, when things dun go my way (which was most of the time in tw?) like my buddy was MIA most of the time, the friggin unpredictable weather, forced to make new friends, sleeping at unearthly hours and waking up at equally unearthly hours in the freezing cold etc etc. it really made me step out of my comfort zone. for the first time im forced to face problems head on and overcome them, or maybe i've been doing that subconsciously my whole life but it has just become obvious to me now.cos like for the first 2 weeks i really had no one to depend on..okay this is turning sensitive i shall continue this in my head haha.but im pretty proud of myself for figuring things out and then having the time of my life =P

anw i dun get why ppl like to call their parents so much when they go overseas.for me the whole point of calling is to let them know im alive and safe, and that only takes a few seconds to say? i mean like..if you tell them that you have not enough money left or you're sick or not enough luggage or you lost something..they cant help you right???so i feel that theres no point in telling them such things (although they may seem like severe problems)..so instead of worrying them, why not just try to overcome them yourself?saves phone bill too :D

haha this blog is like dead.

anw,my official reflection of the tw trip:

Most importantly, this immersion trip to Taiwan has made me a more independent person. Before this trip, my perception of independence had been just taking care of myself when I am alone at home, and therefore I always thought I was independent enough. But after this trip, which is the first time I am away from my parents for so long (3 weeks), I learnt that true independence is taking care of myself when I have no family to turn to; that calling my parents will not only be of no help, but also make matters worse by worrying them. The many difficulties and problems I faced in this trip has changed my perceptions of certain things, and undoubtedly made me a stronger person.

In Taiwan, I learnt to step out of my comfort zone and learnt to make do without the things that I take for granted back in Singapore, and also by being forced to interact with strangers and people whom I am not close to. New and stronger friendships have been forged, and it has certainly been an eye-opening and meaningful experience that I’ll treasure in the years to come.

hahahha.my teacher apparently thinks that this reflection seems to suggest that i was v unhappy in taiwan and so she sent me this sms asking me what happened and why was i unhappy.

anw, i think taiwan is much more fun than china, after having experienced both countries..its hard to say exactly why, but i guess taiwan is just more vibrant?? it shows in a lot of things..its quite hard to describe.and they're more creative too.hmm..china should stop hating taiwan and learn from them man.

some random person just sent me an emial with subject as "life is good". the irony. -.-

heh my taiwanese buddy is finally here..shes damn high but her friends are even more high o.o quite easy to get along with i guess..hehe tmr going ecp to cycle with the other rj ppl and their buddies.gonna be fun!:D

words fail to describe just how screwed i am..but a U for chem is expected, and so is failing math and econs, the question being by how much. now im just pinning all my hopes on geog and gp.haiz. perhaps, finally, im actually being forced to buck up, because at this rate, i will 200% get retained.

i did not shed a single tear, i did not emo. firstly, because im not the least bit surprised, and secondly, im just not that kind of person who does such things, as ppl who know me well can attest to.

frankly, im not afraid of teachers nagging me, nor am i even scared of my parents' inevitable scolding and all sorts of punishment. what i fear most, is the possibility that i'll never find that motivation to buck up. then, i wont be only disappointing my teachers, parents and friends; i'll be disappointing myself, and im afraid i'll regret it for life.

on a side note, i've seemed to become quite noticeably less sociable in jc.hmmm.

&im addicted to tennis, table tennis and badminton! haha perhaps changing cca is too exaggerated, but seriously i've been playing these sports a lot more these few months than volleyball. i've (almost) forgotten how to play vball o.o NOT good.

;failure is not the falling down, but the staying down

i desperately want to get a fever like, NOW.

;the irony indeed

the newspaper, in its tribute to MJ, said this about him: "a lost and tortured soul which touched many lives but could not find peace in his own" and whose "music genius was often overshadowed by his increasingly bizarre private life when he was alive but in death, it is his music legacy that will live on". Fitting words, indeed, for the man who claims he is the "king of pop".



anyway, the england U21s has beaten sweden to advance to the U21s european championships final, where they will face germany. haha its been REEEEALLY long since england has won a penalty shootout at the knockout phase of such a big tournament, and lets hope its a good sign for the World Cup next year hehe. germany will be a tougher opponent than the hosts in the final though, so good luck to england xD



& last minute mugging is definitely NOT working for me

omg just now internet explorer suddenly auto shut down, luckily blogger has auto-save.whew.

michael jackson died..death of a generation?at least, its the death of a pop icon..

plastic surgery may have made him look younger, but it doesnt mask his biological aging at all..perhaps, a lesson for all plastic surgery-wannabes?

and brazil won the hosts 1-0

but i was anticipating a spain-brazil final.clash of the titans y'know?

so i guess i wont be watching the final..GO BRAZIL!! exact revenge for the spanish (:

&so the great and mighty spain lost to minnows USA..

unexpected, yes.shocking, nope.

throghout football history (or soccer as the now famous Americans like to call it), the flair teams have always had a knack of losing to supposedly minnows whose world ranking is like a thousand places below them or a club playing a million places below.thats an exaggeration of course, but you get the picture. their strategy is simple: defend, defend and defend, then counterattack, then back to throwing 10 men in the penalty box -.-

this is not the first time USA has done it, and even if its the last (not possible), there will be other less fancied teams taking over. a good chance would be tmr, when south africa take on brazil. will history repeat itself and the hosts pull off the second major upset in 2 days?

so spain has failed to break the brazilians forgot-how-many consecutive unbeaten games record and extend their already record-breaking consecutive games won. but all these is secondary; their priority should be on learning from this match, and show up again in africa next year and leaner and meaner machine; playing with flair and style has proved to be not enough. beware spain, the Americans will appear next year too. same country, same city, maybe same pitch. lets hope history will not repeat itself then.